I will never forget the day I whispered, "Shame, I feel shame?" It became MY SECRET. I was full of shame and I didn't want anyone to know. When I saw it for what it was I began to intensify my pretending. Do you pretend? "I'm good and you?" "Everything's great, how about you?" You know what I mean. That was me a shame-filled person pretending to be ok in my obesity and addiction and that's just plain crazy!
I felt SUCH shamed about what I had allowed to happen to myself."
I HAD let myself go, and SHAME agreed with me, and said, "see I told you, YOU are bad"...
I HAD cheated on my latest diet plan and SHAME stood there with arms crossed and nodding a head, "I told you, YOU are a real mess"
I HAD started one too many diets on a Monday and couldn't get them through Tuesday, and SHAME reminded me, "see you can't do anything right."
Shame welcomed me into the silent world of "just enough truth to get me to listen"...and LIED TO ME!!!
Shame had driven me all the way into the land of HOPELESSNESS...
I'm sure you know that place and it hurts just as bad as our shame. Losing hope was by far the WORST part of it all. There is no where to turn when there is NO hope.
To help my cousin out I agreed to go on a Lowcarb diet. I abandoned my breads, pastas, rices and beer...oh and potatoes. I embraced whole foods: meats, fish, veggies, eggs and fats. 10 months later, I was 85lbs thinner and coming back to life. I entered into maintenance and that was 2 yrs ago. Keto saved my life, (Dietdoctor.com) having a diet-partner I couldn't afford to let down, saved my diet.
Since then I've maintained most of that weight loss and now I help people all over the country with my coaching services at Find Your Food. I've spent so much time looking at all the breakdown in our lives from our food behaviors. Shame and Hopelessness are two huge players.
You can step away from shame by simply admitting it, and finding new life and truth to believe in. Brene Brown has wonderful work that will teach you all about shame and vulnerability and it will bring such healing. My favorite quote would be..."Guilt says, I've done something bad. Shame says, I am bad"... Shame accuses us day and night!
I catch Shame in the act of trying to move back into my thought life and I refuse to allow it entrance. I run it off with my new self esteem, pride and confidence rooted in a new truth that's running around in my thinner healthier body!
Need help, I can help because I have HOPE....Contact me at Findyourfood2@gmail.com